How one communicates with their child is very personal to them.
Each child is different and responds differently to what excites, agitates or inspires them..
Some need complete attention while talking to them, while others don’t speak at all unless you really get their attention and ask them questions. While we attempt to share tips and points on the best way to communicate with your child, you will have to figure out a permutation and combination that works for them basis their personality. Their reactions may be different in different moods too. We recommend observing how your child reacts to different situations, tones of voice and language so that you can use cues from these observations to effectively communicate with them. .
Here are a few common tips you can follow to communicate effectively with your child:
1. When talking to your child give them full attention: children need attention at all times. They want you to listen to them blabber; they want you to listen to their demands and more. So when talking to your child, give them your complete attention. Avoid looking at your phone or the television while speaking to them.
2. Distract your child to get them to talk: there are times when children are hesitant to share what is on their mind. They may have challenges in expressing what they are going through or maybe unable to find the right words to express them. The best thing to do is to distract them, get them involved in playing a game or watching their favourite show or reading to them. Once they are in a comfortable frame of mind, you can ask them the right question so that they open up and say what is on their mind. It is important to know what your child enjoys, to get them into that set up and win their confidence before you bring up the topic and ask them to share what’s troubling them.
3. Recognise your child’s emotions: your child will react differently to the same question depending on the mood they are in. So notice the emotions your child is displaying and approach your child with the right words. You are likely to get the response you want.
4. Let your child be: there are times when your child is upset or angry and expresses that they do not want to talk yet and want to be left alone. Respect your child’s feelings and let them be for a while. Once they calm down they will come and talk to you.
5. While communicating with your child use positive affirmations: it is best to tell your child all the things they can do, rather than tell them what not to do. When you use positive affirmations it leaves a more lasting impact. Another thing we all know is that as human beings all of us want to do what we are told not to. So even if you want to tell them the don’ts, let them know what they can do instead or reason with them the consequences of doing what you are telling them not to.
6. Use affirmative words at all times: talk use positive affirmations with your kid. Be kind to them. Avoid saying things like ‘you are embarrassing me’ or ‘ you are useless’ or ‘you are stupid’. If you want to correct their behaviour tell them the consequence of bad behaviour, tell them what you are expecting from them. Speak to them at all times like they are an adult. They understand everything. It is important for them to know that you are on their side and are communicating with them in their best interest.
So listed above are some simple tips you can use while communicating with your child. Communication is the key to everything. If you want your child to share what they feel with you and wish to be a friend and guide to them in their life journey, we encourage you to make efforts to gain their trust. This trust will come from communication with them correctly. If you follow these tips and are mindful of what how you communicate with your child you will well be on your way to a smooth parent-child relationship and will always be accepted positively by your child.